I've been hiding from this blog.
Some days it is very helpful to write and keep you informed of what is going on in adoptionland.
But the truth is there is very little going on in adoptionland. This process has been so difficult, so long, and seemingly unending. And while I know the truth of God being in control and we are within his plan and his timing, I'm so incredibly human, so incredibly impatient, and I get tired of faking that adoption-smile sometimes. So I avoid you, dear blog reader. Don't take it personally.
But I don't want to pretend anymore that it's not difficult to see babies born and friends with the joy in their eyes over newly discovered pregnancies. It is hard. Adoption is hard. Infertility is hard. This road we've been on for 18 months is hard. I know that we won't be on this road forever, but depending on the day, the gravity of that truth strikes me in different ways.
God is still providing for us though in other ways. I'm excited to be starting a summer that I won't be traveling for half of it. I'm excited to get a pool membership and spend lots of time with Amanda and her new puppy. I'm excited about the peaches, cherries, blueberries, apples, tomatoes, squash, peppers, and cucumbers that we're nurturing in our backyard. I'm excited to be with family at the beach and at the lake.
And I'm excited to start a new job on Monday!
Paul and I have been praying and seeking the Lord over what I should be doing. I've been so thankful for opportunities to volunteer and watch friends' kids when they are in a bind. But I really felt like I needed to be making some cash. It really comes down to that. I haven't had a haircut in 10 months because I wouldn't allow myself one. Girl needs some dollars. Girl got some split-ends. Paul has been amazingly supportive about me staying home for the past 9 months, but I needed something else.
So Monday, I just felt like I needed to pop into Shank's Bakery to see if they were hiring. Lo and behold, I start working there next Monday.
I'm so excited about this job. I'm excited to get paid to do something that I love to do - to bake and interact with people. I think it will be good to use my hands and make something and to be tired at the end of the day from being at work at 6 am. And God really provided this one - the owners understand the process we are in and are understanding that I may have to leave at a moment's notice. That's been a big fear of mine about finding a job since we started this process.
So thanks for your continued prayers. Thanks for asking about the adoption. Thanks for loving us!
Come buy baked goods from me!
Girl, you have been on my heart and mind & I have been lifting you guys up in prayer like crazy. I now know why...thx so much for posting. Even though our talks are very few and far between these days, you remain dear to my heart always. I miss you, and I hope that (if you're still behind the counter) you will save a special baked good for me to buy in late Aug. ;)
ReplyDeleteCall me for more details (and I promise not to give you an itinerary of when I am free to talk! Just forgive me in advance for the ADD conversation we might have!) & I promise to share the exact details as they firmly come together soon.
Love you so much and miss you even more...hangin' onto the hope of seeing you in a few short months.
Have a GREAT first day!
Laura, so cool to see God providing and to see you continuing to have faith. Praying for you, for patience, and for peace. I wish I was still in town so I could come buy a baked good from you. We miss Shank's so much!
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